#Tryharder

I found myself at the least happiest place on earth during the month of December. A place where every 5 minutes you see someone do the unthinkable. From cutting an old lady off to get a parking spot to seeing a customer yelling at a worker at a shorthanded jewelry store. I saw both of those things happen 10 minutes of each other while shopping at the mall for gifts for my family. In the season of peace, love and joy, the mall is a necessary hell on earth. I had to go there to get the things I needed. I can see the appeal of online shopping and getting Amazon to deliver it. In a world where we look to disconnect and be less face-to-face social, I find myself in situations where complete strangers tend to unload their life story to me.

I have one of those faces.

As I stepped into one of the stores, more suitable for people who need to fill the holes of their multiple piercings or buy a ton of black hoodies to show their individuality while looking like everyone else, I made eye contact with one of the female employees. I wasn't really looking to buy anything at the store, I was more window shopping or looking for something to give me an idea of what to buy. It's funny, most of the time when you don't need assistance, you get plenty. When you need it, everyone is hiding.

This girl was stressed. You could see it in her face and body and feel it in her overall vibe. Breathing in deeply. Running her fingers through her hair, starting at her forehead and going all the way through her shoulder length hair. Looking up towards the ceiling and building up like she was about to cry. After making eye contact with me, she choked out a smile. I spoke first and said "Yeah, I bet its tough working at the mall this time of the year". I've never worked retail, but my wife has and I know that working during the holidays can suck the Christmas spirit right out of you! I have to deal with customers and complaints on a regular basis, but not nearly as much as someone who is working in retail and especially during the holidays.

She responded by saying "Yeah, I actually work two jobs". If you know me, I don't do "surface" conversation well. Small talk is fine here and there, but I'm an all-in kind of person. A guy who wants to know your turn-ons and turns offs, hot buttons and what makes you tick. Yes, even if I never actually know your name, I enjoy getting an early read on people. I work in radio, so to me, every person I speak to is a research opportunity. A chance to better know my audience and how I can connect with them. I can get a person’s life story within 5 questions. I've written about this before and refer to it as my super power. Even when I'm not trying to dig deep, people still want to share.

So I said "well, I hope your second job isn't at the mall because I could see how that could stress you out". This was the turning point in the conversation. This was her out. She could have just said "yes" or "no" and then asked if she could help me with something, but she didn't. It's because I have that kind of face. Maybe it's the eye contact or my friendly smile or the need to tell someone something and get it off her chest, but she opened up like a book.

Her other job is part of the housekeeping staff at a high end hotel. She cleans rooms, fluffs the pillows and stocks the mini bars with the $20 bags of peanuts. While cleaning the room of one of the guests who had checked out, she pricked her finger on what is assumed to be a needle used to deliver insulin to someone that is diabetic. Sure, it's not meth or some other needle injected drug, but still very dangerous when accidentally pricking yourself. She spent four hours, prior to coming to her second job at the mall, at the doctor so that they could run tests on her. This was why she was stressed. Within one minute of meeting this young lady, I was sucked into the current stressful chapter of her life story.

I honestly didn't know what to say. Beyond stating the obvious like "well, that sucks", I just took a second to process it and said "I am sure things will be fine. It's gonna be ok". I really wanted to say more. I really wanted to have some sort of story or quote or something that would help set her at ease, but I really had nothing. That was the best I could do at the time. As I walked away from the store, I had this feeling that I needed to go back and hug the girl. Thinking that maybe that would help to bring her some comfort. Then I thought maybe she might be freaked out by a random stranger walking back into a store 5 minutes after he left, just to hug her. So, I just went on with my shopping. I'm just as curious as you are about to rest of her story and how it all turned out. I really do hope she’s ok. I wish I could have said more.

In all honesty, this type of thing happens to me a lot. People, for some reason, want to share with me things that I probably have no business hearing or knowing. I have that face. Like the kid from The Sixth Sense that sees dead people, I hear stories. Perhaps it's not all my face, but maybe my ability to listen and not immediately judge? Maybe there is a higher power putting us all in random situations or placing us into each other's lives to help each other out a the perfect moment? This girl needed to tell someone her story that day and I happened to be the random friendly face that got the job.

#Tryharder to be aware that everything is not about you. Maybe there are moments or opportunities in this world that are not focused on your needs and your betterment in any way. Perhaps it's a relationship that you were once in and looking back you have no idea what you got out of it. It might be that the other person needed you to be the bridge that got them to another place in their life and you got very little in return. You scratch your head and continue to wonder why, but you may never know because it wasn't your time. I dated 4 different girls days prior to them meeting the man of their dreams. The man they eventually married. Chances are, I was a bridge of some sort for them in their journey and I wasn't supposed to get anything life altering out of those relationships besides the story of "I went out with 4 different girls that immediately found their future husbands afterwards".

This young lady might have just needed to hear that everything is going to be alright from a complete stranger. She needed to release the pressure and tell someone her story. Perhaps I helped her get through her second shift of the day. Maybe I did get something out of it too? A muse to inspire me to write a chapter about why the world isn't always about you and how we need to embrace the possibility of being a bridge in the journey of someone else’s life.