Long ago I stopped arguing with idiots.
Seriously, it’s not good for your health. The stress of continuing a conversation with someone, who you will never convince they are wrong, could send you to an early grave- or make you pull your hair out. I’m flexible, open minded and don’t always have to be right. As a matter of fact, for the sake of the impending argument, I often want to be wrong.
I have friends who like to exchange with idiots. Almost like they have this strange need to make sure that they (the idiots) know that they are wrong. Why? Why would you waste energy on these people? Perhaps this comes from a place where they need the drama or even insecurity? I don’t know the answer.
Like Don Quixote and windmills- you’re fighting a no win battle.
I have a teaching spirit and one of the reasons I have a blog stems from my need to share knowledge and ideas. Some people are just idiots and no matter how much “reason” you feel the need to pump into them-they just refuse to budge from their place of ignorance.
Don’t argue with them. Arguing with an idiot only makes you an idiot. It takes two to tango right? The next time you feel you’re on the verge of an exchange with an idiot, ask yourself “is this really worth the time and energy”?
There is just one thing to keep in mind in all this….make sure you’re not the idiot.
St. Jude was the patron saint of lost causes. I know these things because I grew up Catholic and my parents were Beatles fans. In life, we all have a soft spot for the underdog or the person who just can’t get it together and we enable them by constantly dragging them, kicking and screaming, into success.
But do they ever really become successful?
Often, we want it for them more than they want it for themselves. Like everyone else, I’ve made this mistake with these people in my life. You see potential or maybe just pity them and if you could just spend a little more time with them- you know you can turn them around. More often than not, the investment of your time does not yield the results you thought it would. This person becomes a “life bandit”. They steal your time, energy, resources, (sometimes your money) and almost always break your heart.
Don’t be St. Jude.
You can’t want it more than they do and you have to know when to let go. It’s a cold hearted thing to do, but often these people are impeding your success both in life and in your career. For ladies, it might be the guy you just can’t change. Guys-it’s the buddy that just wants to be miserable, but is upset because you don’t want to be miserable with them. In your career, it could be the employee who does something good once in a while and that one success is what keeps them off the chopping block. Those people will most likely be the weakest member of the team and will almost always bring the group down.
(Family is different. You can’t rid them from your life like you would a friend or co-worker….so, for this blog, we’ll keep your brother out of it.)
Know when to lance the cancer. You don’t need or deserve it and this person is not healthy for your life. Sometimes by letting go, it’s the best things that could ever happen to that person. Perhaps, because you are no longer an enabler, they have to stand on their own two feet. They just might realize that it’s time for them to take ownership of their life and embrace the consequences.
Maybe.
You’ll never know unless you let go.
Hey Jude, “Don’t carry the world upon your shoulders”.
#beatles #heyjude #catholic
When the larger companies have to cut costs and eliminate their bench, the smaller companies become the farm system for those larger companies. Investing in talent and people is imperative to being successful in business. It's equally important to run the company effectively and profitable. Often times these things do not go hand in hand.
Smaller companies need to invest in ways of building and keeping their key people. Almost as if they are making an offering to the radio gods, they hand over their big prospects only to have to start over again and hope they can get a little more time out of the replacement. This is life. Yet, if they perhaps tried a little harder to maintain these people before they got the offer from the larger companies, they might be surprised how loyal that person might be.
Smaller guys....don't wait till your key employee gets the offer to suddenly express to them how awesome you think they are. It's too late. It's like saying "I love you" back to the girl 30 minutes after she said those words to you. The feeling and the moment have passed. Building loyalty in employees is easy. Everyone, deep down, wants to be a "company guy", but more often than not, we all become guns for hire. Offering ourselves up to the highest bidder with room for additional growth.
This is reality. Companies need to do a gut check sometimes. Is the amount of stunted momentum from when they leave-worth the amount of money you need to pay in order to keep key employees from being poached? I don't know the answer to that. What I do know is that I have worked for 3 companies in the last 13 years (currently working at the 3rd). With those first two companies I worked hard, shot up the ranks and considered myself a "company guy". My loyalty was always there and I left those companies on great terms. They both told me how valuable and awesome I was to the company as then watched me walk out the door. Perhaps waiting till I packed up my office to tell me was a bad idea?
Evaluate your people. If they are stars, let them know. Nothing bad will ever come with telling someone they are doing a great job-when they are actually doing a great job. Waiting till the end of a contract or when another company offers them something terrific is not the way to invest in people.
While flying to Boston to watch my best friend Geoff get married, I sat next to a kid named Taylor during the first leg of the trip. Taylor is a 4th grade student heading into 5th when his summer comes to an end. Taylor has no idea what he inspired.
About 45 minutes into the 2 hour leg to Atlanta, curiosity got the best of him as he repeatedly looked over at my tray and read the words that I was typing on my iPad. He asked me what it was that I was writing about. Those who know me, know that my brain doesn't shut off very often and I don't do well with "me time". I was, of course, working on a project for work. (yes, this should be a vacation). I'm by no means a martyr, I just happen to enjoy strategic work related thinking/writing. (zzzzzz)
I shut my iPad down and engaged in a conversation with the kid. Probably one of the smartest things I had done all week. Probably smarter than the work stuff I was doing.
In less than 10 minutes I knew his life story. He's a kid-they tell you everything. I knew that he was the fastest kid in his class. I learned that he was changing schools this year, 5th grade has him kind of nervous, where his grandparents lived, best rides to ride at Six Flags, how many siblings he has and lastly-after asking me what I do for a living, he then told me what he wanted to be when he grew up.
"I might be a professional runner, a football player or a dancer (because he liked country music)". Taylor, the kid in seat 43B could be anything he wanted to be because that's what kids do.
It always bothers me when I hear the phrase "but I don't know how to do anything else but....(fill in occupation here)". To me, that's sad. You get fired from your job and you turn around and limit yourself to opportunities-just the way you limited yourself by not learning additional trades or picking up a hobby that could later end up being a vocation. Sticking to that one job because it's all you know. Kind of close minded huh? Are people supposed to be impressed by that? Is that the kind of stuff you say on a job interview? "Hey, hire me because I only know how to do this".
Taylor wants the world. As a kid, that's easy because you don't have the worries of grown up life. Nobody fired you. Nobody has broken your heart and the insecurities of adolescence haven't kicked in yet. You don't have any scars besides the one from when you fell off your bike doing that kick ass jump in the driveway! (mom wasnt impressed) The world is a blank canvas and an open book when you are a kid. We should learn from that. I hope to see Taylor win a gold medal in the relay, throw a Superbowl winning TD pass and follow it up with a spot on Dancing With The Stars!
Whats stopping you?
#flying #kids #judybloom #superfudge
“I have 20 years of experience”. “I am a seasoned vet”. “I've been around the block and I know what I am doing”. All things that people might think are helping them get the employers attention are actually the things that are preventing you from getting the job.
20 years of experience might mean you are un-teachable, bull headed, set in your ways. It could also mean you have been doing this job wrong for 20 years.
Experience is great. People want to hire smart successful people who can act like they have been there. I have seen both sides of experience. I have been blessed to work with seasoned vets who know how to take it to the next level and run up the score on the other guys. Unfortunately, I have also seen the other side of experience. Those people who are stuck in their ways, unable to evolve, adapt or pull the trigger. These people have tons of talent-restrained by their inability to completely tap into it.
In life, I refer to these people as "damn shames". Sounds kind of harsh, but these people have more talent than I have ever dreamed of having! Damn shames are people who could be so good at something, but somewhere along the way they created road blocks for themselves or false limitations-derived from a lack of confidence. Damn shames...could have the world in the palm of their hands, but would rather spend their energy looking for ways to derail themselves or discount their talents. Chances are you know someone like this. Damn shame...
When looking to get your experience level across to an employer, look to your successes to tell the story. Focus on wins and education and not the assumption that "20 years equals I'm 20 times better than everyone else". If you cannot look back at the last 20 years and come up with some solid wins that illustrate your level of ability and actual education (not presumed education based on your years of experience)....you might be a damn shame.
If that's the case, time for you to start over and reinvent yourself. Remove the road blocks you have set for yourself, go against the grain of what you consider conventional wisdom and accept you are prone to being in a rut (and become a damn shame). Wipe the slate clean and let go of the previous 20 years of experience. I am not asking anyone to second guess themselves to death, I am simply suggesting for you to be real and honest with yourself. It's healthy and it's always the right thing to do. The only other options are to keep banging your head against the wall....or you could always look for something else to do?
Pull the trigger.
#pullthetrigger #workexperience #life
